7 quick takes: favorite prayers, a snobby review of my favorite music, and my cat.

1. This, I have come upon fairly recently. It is a prayer before Mass by Saint Ambrose. I can clearly see why Saint Augustine was so taken by this man's preaching. His words say what I cannot summon, but my soul longs to express.

O loving Lord Jesus Christ, I, a sinner, not presuming on my own mertis, but trusting in Your mercy and goodness, with fear and awe approach the table of Your most sacred banquet. For I have stained both my heart and body with many sins, and have not kept a strict guard over my mind and tongue. Wherefore, O gracious God, O awful majesty, I, a wretched creature, entangled in difficulties, have recourse to You, the fount of mercy; to You I fly for healing and take refuge under Your protection, and I ardently desire to have Him as my Savior whom I am unable to face as my Judge. 

To You, Lord, I show my wounds, to You I lay bare my shame. I know that my sins are many and great and on their account I am filled with fear. But I trust in Your mercy, which is endless. Look down on me, therefore, with the eyes of mercy, Lord Jesus Christ, eternal King, God and Man, crucified for men. Hear me, for my hope is in You; have mercy on me, for I am full of sin and wretchedness, You who never cease to let flow the fountain of mercy.

 Hail Victim of Salvation, offered for me and for all mankind on the tree of the cross. Hail, noble and precious Blood, flowing from the wounds of my crucified Lord Jesus Christ washing away the sins of the whole world. Remember, Lord, Your creature, whom You have redeemed with Your Blood. I am grieved because I have sinned. I desire to make amends for what I have done. 

Take away from me, therefore, O most merciful Father, all my iniquities and my sins, that, being purified both in soul and body, I may worthily partake of the Holy of Holies; and grant that this holy oblation of Your Body and Blood, of which though unworthy I purpose to partake, may be to me the remission of my sins, the perfect cleansing of all my offenses, the means of driving away all evil thoughts and of renewing all holy desires, the accomplishment of works pleasing to You, as well as the strongest defense for soul and body against the snares of my enemies. 

 Amen. 

2.   I am not sure if this is also from St. Ambrose, but it is a beautiful Act of Hope.

Since Thou dost deign to come and dwell within me, O my Redeemer, what may I not expect from Thy bounty! I therefore present myself before Thee with that lively confidence which Thine infinite goodness inspires. Thou not only knowest all my wants, but Thou also art willing and able to relieve them. Thou hast not only invited me, but also promised me Thy gracious assistance.

Amen

3. Prayer for Those Whose Lives I Touched   F.E. Callaghan

 Beloved Shepherd of Souls!
As I tread into the sunset of my life, I grow anxious for the spiritual welfare of souls who came to know me.
It grieves me to think of the offenses they may have committed because of words or deeds of mine.
I have in mind those who were my close responsibility as well as those whom I sponsored in Baptism
and whose spiritual condition is no longer known to me.

In Your Merciful Goodness I now plead for the pardon of the soul who because of me may have lost Your favour.
Humbly I implore You, let not one of them be lost, but when they leave this world may they find glorious entry into the Kingdom of Heaven!

On behalf of those who may need to atone for offenses I may have caused them to commit,
I offer You any infirmities or sufferings I am to undergo during the remaining years of my life.

Dear Shepherd of Souls, grant them life eternal.

---

 4.  TODAY

My life is a gift of God given, not years but a day at a time. Today is the day the Lord has made for me, and he planned it to be the most important day of my life. Yesterday is gone, never to return. I must not worry about it, but leave it    in the hands of God.

Tomorrow and all that it holds is God's secret and its coming is not assured.

Only today is mine. Each day, arranged by God with infinite wisdom and goodness is his gift,     his act of love for me.

In thanksgiving I will offer him every day the gift of myself my prayers, works, joys and sufferings.

Please God, receive them graciously.

-from a daily prayer book given out by my home parish, St. Monica

5.  Okay, I know you were waiting with baited breath for my Snobby Music Review. 

Bob and I were blessed to go see a program of music at the Kimmel Canter last week, of various artists and time periods, but all pieces I absolutely adore. Okay, maybe not the Franck organ piece. But everything else.

Here is the blurb about the program:

Fauré's Requiem

Alain Altinoglu - Conductor
Michael Stairs - Organ
Susanna Phillips - Soprano
Philippe Sly - Bass-baritone
The Philadelphia Singers Chorale - Mixed chorus
David Hayes - Music director

program Gabrieli - Canzon septimi toni No. 2, from Sacrae symphoniae
Franck - Organ Chorale No. 1 in E major
Villa-Lobos - Bachianas brasileiras No. 5
Duruflé - Four Motets on Gregorian Themes
Dukas - Fanfare from La Péri
Fauré - Requiem

Thursday, March 13, 2014

8:00 pm Verizon Hall

Philadelphia Orchestra Music Director Yannick Nézet-Séguin has regretfully withdrawn from performances scheduled for March 13, 14, and 15 at the Kimmel Center in Philadelphia. Conductor Alain Altinoglu, whose engagement comes at the recommendation of Mr. Nézet-Séguin, has graciously agreed to lead the Orchestra on those dates, making his Philadelphia Orchestra debut. There will be no change to the previously-announced program.
The Orchestra’s multi-season exploration of the great requiems continues with Fauré’s intimate and contemplative work. Its distinctive orchestration of lower strings is the centerpiece of a spiritual program featuring unique combinations and ensembles in styles ranging from Medieval chant to antiphonal brass to Brazilian rhythms.


                        the conductor, Alain Altinoglu
             Looks a bit like our own Fr. Kelley. But French.


The only review I could find of this concert, I'm sorry reviewer, but, woefully inadequate. So here is mine.

The Philadelphia Orchestra Brass. Take your breath away. They were like one big brassy instrument, they were so perfectly in tune and together. I have known and loved the Fanfare from La Peri my whole life, I know it inside and out, and have listened to it done by scores of different groups. Philly, you were the very best. My only slight disappointment was that it seemed kind of fast, and some of the harmonies not allowed to linger, even for a second longer, before they were gone.

Here it is done the way I like it. The video says it is 24 minutes, don't worry the fanfare is just the first short piece, about two and a half minutes. Philly zipped through it much quicker. Mr. Altinoglu replaced Nézet-Séguin, and I can't help but wonder if he might have savored it a bit more.

You may have also noticed the Durufle motets are on the program also.. I posted the Ubi Caritas a few weeks ago. Beautifully done at this concert by the Philadelphia singers. My only distraction was one smallish Philadelphia Singer. A bass, smack in the center, right beneath the organ, who kept catching my eye, buried though he was, and the lighting was left very soft. He had a sort of alarming mannerism of lifting his chin and stretching out his neck with each note, while making a pursed-lip "oooooo" formation. How he did that no matter what the words were baffles me still. But the effect in general was...

I curse my love of Mr.Bean at times like this.


 The main reason I wanted to see this concert to begin with, was the Faure Requiem. Much like the Fanfare, it is a piece I have have loved and listened to since my teenage years, except this piece has become part of the FABRIC OF MY BEING.  I have a favorite recording, to me the Only Way to properly perform it, (haha), so I knew going in, that hearing it done some Other Way was going to be a little rough.

Again, I don't know if the conductor had any responsibility for how it was done, my apologies, Mr. Altinoglu, but I was really sad. Some of the most gorgeous parts were completely glossed over. At times, the tempo was double what it should have been. I could see him conducting in cut time. One of the most exquisite Amens in all of music was practically obliterated. Now, would it have been the same under Nézet-Séguin? Who knows. But if indeed this conductor's way was significantly different, then bravo to the orchestra and singers for gamely following. It was so painful to hear this Requiem raced through in parts, and it's dynamic range greatly reduced. The ppps were there but none of the fs, or the occasional ff. Which made the ppps seem less ppp. If you get my drift.

So, here is The Version, for anyone who might like to enhance the beauty of their Lent with a Requiem. I was only able to find the ending movement to share with you here.

In paradisum deducant te Angeli; in tuo adventu suscipiant te martyres, et perducant te in civitatem sanctam Ierusalem. Chorus angelorum te suscipiat, et cum Lazaro quondam paupere æternam habeas requiem.

May angels lead you into paradise; upon your arrival, may the martyrs receive you and lead you to the holy city of Jerusalem. May the ranks of angels receive you, and with Lazarus, once the poor man, may you have eternal rest.

  

6. I am obviously not going in order of gravity here. As a way to give alms this Lent, please go here and consider helping this order of monks. There is a link to go through Pay Pal.

7.    And, lastly in gravity, but firstly in cuteness; my cat.

7 quick takes #5-Lenten Friday style; of Work and Grace

1. First Friday, and  Fourth Friday of Lent~ hope you all are experiencing a fruitful Lent. Or if you are like me, maybe just trying to practice faithfulness in devotion and discipline. It's been a little different for me this year, because I have to watch my fatigue level and not get too overtaxed. So maybe some of the discipline comes in NOT trying to "do" too much. Ah, the age old lesson of "being." If you happen to "be " a mom, like me, or a dad, there is a certain "doing" requirement in our contract.

  --which brings me to---

2. I have been paying a little closer attention to what it means to offer my life to Christ. If I think in terms of point #1 above, I know I can't "work " my way into heaven without an inner conversion of heart. The outward actions alone are not enough if they aren't flowing from inside, from the works the Holy Spirit is doing to conform me to Christ. That said, we parents know that there is an awful lot of work to be done. Which brings me to that place where, as Brother Lawrence talked about in  The Practice the Presence of God, everything I do I can offer as a prayer and sacrifice, especially if I do something "extra" say, iron my husbands shirts. (No, I don't do that regularly; you may know my husband as the Guy With the Rumpled Shirts). Any and all of these I find can draw me closer to God and give me a sense of peace as I go about my day, knowing whatever small tasks I offer Him, He can use them for my continued conversion and His glory.

3. James talks about faith and works in Chapter two of his epistle:

 ¹⁴ What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? ¹⁵¹⁶ If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? ¹⁷ In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food.  ¹⁸ But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”
   Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. ¹⁹ You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.
 ²⁰ You foolish person, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless^[d]? ²¹ Was not our father Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? ²²²³ And the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,”^[e] and he was called God’s friend. ²⁴ You see that a person is considered righteous by what they do and not by faith alone. You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did.
 ²⁵ In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction? ²⁶ As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead. 


 The famous quote of Martin Luther, referring to James as "the Epistle of Straw," though he later retracted that statement, speaks to the difficulty people have when viewing how their works affect their spiritual life and salvation. The Little Flower said it best, (thus becoming a Doctor of the Church), I am a very little soul, who can offer only very little things to the Lord".
If she, being a Saint and all, can do this, it stands to reason, so can we.

4. My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

“The burden of life is from ourselves, its lightness from the grace of Christ and the love of God.” -William Bernard Ullanthorne (1806-1889)  

"That is the mystery of grace: it never comes too late. -François Mauriac (1885-1970)

  “The law detects, grace alone conquers sin.” - Saint Augustine of Hippo (354-430) 

“Lord I crawled across the barrenness to you with my empty cup uncertain in asking any small drop of refreshment. If only I had known you better I'd have come running with a bucket.” -Nancy Spiegelberg  

“For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.” - Saint Augustine of Hippo (354-430)

5. William Adolphe Borgereau, 

             In Penitence

6.  I think T.S. Elliot was talking about our current weather when he wrote this:

Lord, the Roman hyacinths are blooming in bowls and
The winter sun creeps by the snow hills;
The stubborn season has made stand.


(A little excerpt from A Song for Simeon)
  
How Lenten.





7.  Please remember all those who you have encountered on line who need your prayers, and those who have asked for them.

Venreable Solanus Casey, Pray for us!

Wishing you all a blessed and hopefully, somewhat restful weekend.

Peace, 

 Kelly

hooray-I can post again! and tell you how I met my husband. or ~ providence~

Whew! it's good to be back. I had a pesky computer bug that wouldn't allow me to post to my blog all week. The nerve! But my dear husband found a fix, and Ta Da! Here I am.

 Well, while I am on the subject of the DH, I think I will tell you the story of how we met. 

You may remember that I was song leader for the charismatic prayer group during the period of my conversion. This group held a mass a couple times a year in one of the neighborhood churches--the one Bob went to, turns out. He functioned there as a sacristan at times, among many other things. Of all the things that come to mind, I will be as charitable as possible and just say that he was a great help and support to the priest that served there at that time. The prayer group masses were always on a Tuesday evening, and Bob attended a few so as to keep Father from having to come over and close up. (Father was not terribly "into" the charismatic arm of the church. -again-Understatement- but he did allow us to meet at the church, so many thanks to him). Apparently, Bob had attended a time or two when I was there functioning as cantor for the mass, and "just happened to be there" one Tuesday in February 2005, and approached me after mass to offer his services as pianist "if I was interested".All the quotations are a little elbow to the ribs to point out that he was, in fact, coming to these masses because of his interest in me, as WELL as to close up for Father. This was not apparent to me as I took his number, written on the back of a number for a crisis pregnancy center. I was kind of used to being approached by people, (okay, men), that said they played guitar (didn't I already play guitar?), who frankly, seemed a bit to odd to want to work with. Plus, I have experience with people who say that they sing or play...and then....um, no. But, Bob seemed quite genuine, didn't play the same instrument I did, and the thought of having a piano appealed to me. 
 
So on a Sunday night a couple weeks later, I dug his number out of my purse while on the way home from doing a kid pick up in Delaware. Melissa and I went back and forth about what we thought his last name was, so when I called, I just asked for Bob. Again, I wasn't aware of any other agenda than the music, so when I asked if he remembered who I was, he apparently had a moment. We decided to get together to run through some music and see how it went ( he still refers to this as his "audition") on March 3rd. Needless to say, it went well. Even on the little toy keyboard, I could tell he really did know how to play, and he was such a darn nice guy! 


And so the story goes--we had a lovely courtship, under the counsel of our favorite Augustinian priest-Father Terry-- Bob, crediting St. Augustine to his return to the Church, me, being a parishioner of Saint Monica Church--well, it all fit so nicely. We married on May 13th (first day of the appearances of our Lady at Fatima).  Our mentor and friend, Father Terry, died on October 13th. (the last of the Fatima appearances). We were his last wedding; we were told he had our wedding picture on his nightstand.

 I have been asked occasionally about our Augustinian devotion. I haven't researched the daylights out of it- but what I have learned about Saint Augustine, is that he was a thinker and a lover. To read his writings, one has to really dig in, it is not your average novelette. He is a Father and Doctor of the Church, and his writings shaped the Church's very foundations. But he was also filled to overflowing with the love of Christ, illustrated by his famous exclamation, "Late have I loved you, O Beauty ever ancient, ever new." It was Father Terry's love that taught us more about Christ and the church than anything else. While waiting to confess, we would often hear laughter wafting out of Father Terry's station. His viewing at Villanova was attended by scores of Augustinian Friars, some of which shared funny and heartwarming memories. They were a joyful lot, all radiating that same peace and good humor we remember of Father Terry, despite all his illnesses and setbacks. So those are my thoughts on that.

 Bob and I are approaching our fifth wedding anniversary. My seven kids became his step kids and he has loved and cared for them valiantly through thick and thin. Mostly thick, I think. We love to play music, we are active in the pro life movement-with a group called Helpers of God's Precious Infants, which  incidentally, he was a member of for some years before I met him. (remember the crisis pregnancy card with his phone number?) We know that we are blessed, even through the struggles, with the many gifts the Lord had given us. We hope to continue to be faithful and grow in Him and serve Him well all the rest of our days.